How My Daughter Taught Me To have A Growth Mindset
Have you ever watched you baby, toddler, and or preschooler at play or learning something new. A few weeks ago we were visiting a trampoline park, and they had a section for younger children. In this section was a small rock wall and below it a huge pit filled with foam blocks.
My 5 year old was working on the Rock wall, and she had little experience with a Rock wall, sure she had used a few at playgrounds. But this rock wall was like an adult rock wall. As the kids played & I will admit I jumped into the foam pit a few times. I observed my daughter repeatedly work on getting to the top of that wall.
Each time she would lose her footing or get stuck she would let go or fall and start over again and again. I helped her a few times with suggestions when she would ask, but she kept at it until she accomplished the task of getting to the top of the wall.
I was struck by her determination at working through this task and obstacle and it made me think of all the ways I see my children working at overcoming obstacles on a daily basis. My 3 year old works constantly at overcoming her fear of heights when she challenges herself with different slides at the playground, my 5 year old once spent an entire hour at the playground working on the monkey bars, and then my crazy fearless 1 year old is determined to do everything his big sisters can til he accomplishes the task.
In observing all these moments I realized that sometimes as adults we lose this lack of focus and determination in our lives. Sure obstacles in life can be more daunting and challenging than say a Rock wall or monkey bars but when did we become ok with giving up? I can tell you countless projects or challenges that I have walked away from or given up because I let the obstacles and to be honest excuses win!
Somewhere in our adolescence as we shift into adulthood some of us lose that growth mindset and or determination. We all know of those who don’t and manage to keep lighting the fires and running the obstacle courses to come out the other side stronger and successful. In recent months I have listened to podcast after podcast and books all by women who have stood in the face of some big obstacles and pushed, clawed, and fought their way to successes.
Why are they different than me? I realize they are not different we are all women with lives and our own personal battles, but what sets them apart is they show up every day and work at their goals & dreams. As I watched my daughter complete and finally reach the top of the rock wall I realized that she is still at the point in her life where she is following internal instincts and knows that if she keeps on pushing, clawing, and showing up that she will accomplish her goals. We are all born with it but somewhere along the way we let that fire and growth mindset be overcome by our own negative self-talk and outside influences.
But can we change? Personally I think Yes… or better put why the Hell not! You are only prisoner to your own set of limitations. If I look at my daughter and think I don’t need to put limitations on myself then I can accomplish anything I put my mind and heart too. I can look at her shiny example of determination and realize if I follow three principles I will accomplish my dreams. 1. Always have a growth mindset 2. Be willing to ask for help or seek out answers to problems 3. Know that anything worth accomplishing is going to take hard work & determination and failure.
I am thankful for that day at the jump zone…not because I got to be a kid again and jump and fling myself into a foam pit, but for having my eyes opened to determination in action. When I think about giving up on my dream or starting to throw out excuses I now think about my daughter and that rock wall. I think about my own growth mindset and ways to challenge myself. I also have come to realize there is not set time on working towards achieving goals & dreams.
Each day has become that for me a day to reach for my stars and work towards my goals. No more excuses or giving up. Sure I have days when I fail but I now pick myself up and keep working at it. My ultimate goal is for my children to see their mother not give up and to always push for her dreams. I want them to never lose that growth mindset.
Til Our Next Adventure,